Play 314: A Realistic Reunion

CHARACTERS
JOHN, 17
FRANK, 17

JOHN
Frank?

FRANK
John?

JOHN
Hey!

FRANK
Hey man, how’s it going?

JOHN
It’s been okay. How are you doing?

FRANK
I’m good.

JOHN
I can’t think of the last time we saw each other.

FRANK
At least a year or two.

JOHN
Yeah, wow.

(Beat.)

FRANK
How’ve you been?

JOHN
I’ve been pretty good. You?

FRANK
Same.

JOHN
How you like your school?

FRANK
It’s pretty good. How about yours?

JOHN
Not too shabby.

FRANK
Cool.

JOHN
You been up to much lately?

FRANK
Just the usual.

JOHN
Cool.

FRANK
Yeah. How about you, still playing basketball?

JOHN
Yeah.

FRANK
That’s cool.

JOHN
Yeah.

(Beat.)

FRANK
It’s funny seeing you.

JOHN
You too.

FRANK
Middle schools seems like so long ago.

JOHN
Ages.

(Beat.)

FRANK
I hate to say this, but I should probably be going.

JOHN
Oh?

FRANK
Yeah, sorry.

JOHN
Don’t worry about it.

FRANK
But, we should hang out sometime.

JOHN
Oh yeah, definitely.

FRANK
Cool.

JOHN
So I’ll see you sometime soon then.

FRANK
Yeah. Take it easy.

JOHN
You too.

(Blackout.)

Play 313: Unfortunately (Very)

CHARACTERS
VINCENT, 17
DEREK, 17

DEREK
You taking them tomorrow too?

VINCENT
Unfortunately.

DEREK
Yeah.

(Beat.)

VINCENT
Standardized testing is such bullshit.

DEREK
It is.

VINCENT
It only tests very specific stuff.

DEREK
Yeah.

VINCENT
Plus, rich people can afford all kinds of tutoring so it just gives them another advantage.

DEREK
True.

VINCENT
And racist too.

DEREK
How?

VINCENT
I’m not really sure, but a lot of studies have shown that.

(Beat.)

It’s all just such bullshit.

DEREK
It really is.

(Pause.)

DEREK
Wait…

VINCENT
What?

DEREK
Don’t you do well on standardized testing?

(Beat.)

VINCENT
Yeah.

DEREK
So why are you complaining?

VINCENT
Just cause I do well doesn’t mean it’s not bullshit.

DEREK
I guess.

(Beat.)

DEREK
Wait, didn’t you get like a—

VINCENT
Yeah.

(Beat.)

DEREK
You should shut the hell up then.

VINCENT
I know.

(Blackout.)

Play 312: Hard-Wired Empathy

CHARACTERS
1
2

1
How’s it going?

2
I’m okay.

1
Yeah?

(Beat.)

2
I actually kind of feel like being alone for a bit.

1
How come?

2
Just a bit of a bad mood.

1
You sure you don’t want to talk about it?

2
Yeah.

1
I might be able to help.

2
No, I’m fine.

1
If you stay here by yourself you’ll just get in a worse mood.

2
Maybe.

(Pause.)

2
Did you know that why people need other people to feel happy is all just a result of evolution?

1
What?

2
We just evolved to need other people because if you’re with other people, you’re more likely to survive than you would alone.

1
That’s part of it.

2
That’s all of it. Even things like feeling connection to other people is just biology. Mirror neurons.

1
Mirror whats?

2
Neurons. They react to the emotions of another person, mirror what they’re feeling. Biologically hard-wired empathy.

1
Really?

2
Yeah. They make you feel what they feel. And act similar too. You synchronize body posture and speech rhythms within seconds of talking to someone.

1
I’ve noticed that a bit I guess, never thought it was something that concrete though.

2
It is.

(He laughs.)

All that meaning we attribute to relationships of any kind is bullshit. It’s all just basic survival instincts in reality. Nothing more.

(Beat.)

1
I guess.

(Pause.)

1
But why does it even matter?

2
It doesn’t bother you at all?

1
No, it doesn’t change anything. Who cares what the reason is, or if it’s all only practical. Doesn’t change the fact that we find connection with other people fulfilling. Doesn’t mean you don’t need other people.

(Beat.)

2
I guess.

(Pause.)

1
Do you still want me to leave?

(Beat.)

2
You can stay for a bit if you want.

(Blackout.)

Play 311: Patterns

CHARACTERS
1
2

2
Know what’s weird?

1
What?

2
That we’re not actually any physical thing.

1
What are you talking about?

2
We’re not.

1
What about our bodies?

2
That’s who we are physically now.

1
I don’t think I’m getting your point.

2
That’s not who we are always though.

1
You’re saying we’re not the same person throughout our lives?

2
Not physically.

(Beat.)

1
I’m really confused.

2
Well, every seven years our body is completely different.

1
It is?

2
Yeah, the particles that make up our body are all different.

1
Okay.

(Beat.)

1
I still don’t get what you were saying though.

2
Well, since our body’s made of entirely different particles, we’re a completely different physical thing.

1
I guess.

2
And yet we’re the same person.

(Beat.)

1
I guess that’s kind of weird.

2
Yeah.

(Beat.)

1
So what are we?

2
Just a pattern.

1
A pattern?

2
Yeah.

(Beat.)

1
Strange.

2
Yeah.

(Beat.)

We have all these lofty concepts of what it is to be human, or conscious, but when it gets down to it, all we really are is a pattern of particles that exists in space for a finite period of time. That’s it.

1
Yeah.

(Pause.)

1
Doesn’t seem to really make sense.

2
Nope. Not if you think about it enough.

(Blackout.)

Play 310: The Sad Thing Is I Didn’t Make This Up

CHARACTERS
TEACHER
STUDENT

STUDENT
I have some questions about the test.

TEACHER
I’d be glad to answer them.

STUDENT
Well, a few of the question seemed kind of off.

TEACHER
How so.

STUDENT
The first one seems to be off by a multiple of ten.

TEACHER
You probably just made a small mistake.

STUDENT
I’m pretty sure I didn’t. Look.

(Pause.)

TEACHER
This does seem to look correct…

STUDENT
Yeah, I though so.

TEACHER
I’m sorry then, I guess I did write the wrong thing then.

STUDENT
Okay.

(Beat.)

And problem 3.

TEACHER
What about it?

STUDENT
None of the choices are correct.

TEACHER
No, this one is.

STUDENT
No it’s not.

TEACHER
How isn’t it?

STUDENT
The river’s speed is way greater than the vertical component of the velocity, so it wouldn’t end up directly across the river.

(Pause.)

TEACHER
Oh, I guess you’re right.

STUDENT
Yeah.

TEACHER
I’m really sorry, I’ll make sure to check all the questions more carefully this time.

(Beat.)

STUDENT
And the last problem, problem 10.

TEACHER
What about it?

STUDENT
Well, you said the block’s going 5 meters per second squared.

TEACHER
Yes.

STUDENT
Well, if there were no weight holding it back, it’d go 4.9 meters per second squared.

(He points to some of his work.)

(Beat.)

TEACHER
Yes, that’s true.

(Beat.)

STUDENT
That doesn’t make any sense.

TEACHER
Why?

STUDENT
The block is moving faster with a weight pulling it back than it would without that weight.

(Beat.)

TEACHER
Oh.

STUDENT
Yeah, it makes no sense at all.

(Beat.)

TEACHER
You’re right.

STUDENT
Yeah, I know.

(Blackout.)

Play 309: The Subtext is Love, and the Title Isn’t Ironic

CHARACTERS
KATE, 17
MELINDA, 17

MELINDA
Oh?

KATE
Yeah, he’s just the greatest.

MELINDA
Cool.

KATE
I can’t even believe how in love with him I am, I never even thought it was possible.

MELINDA
Cool.

KATE
And he’s so sweet too. Last Tuesday was our anniversary, and he got me chocolates and flowers…

MELINDA
That is sweet.

(Beat.)

And original too.

KATE
I know.

(Pause.)

MELINDA
This week really needs to end, I’m so tired. The weekend’ll be nice.

KATE
I know, I’m looking forward to it so much

(Beat.)

MELINDA
You doing anything interesting?

KATE
Well, he’s taking me out to dinner on Friday.

MELINDA
Oh?

KATE
Yeah, and on Saturday we’re going to go see a movie.

(Beat.)

MELINDA
Cool.

KATE
Yeah, I can’t wait

(Pause.)

KATE
What’re you doing?

MELINDA
Nothing much.

KATE
Cool.

MELINDA
Yeah.

(Pause.)

KATE
I just can’t believe how great it is.

MELINDA
That’s great.

KATE
I know.

MELINDA
I’m so happy for you.

KATE
Thanks.

(Blackout.)

Play 308: It’s the Principle

CHARACTERS
ERIC, 18
MATT, 18

ERIC
Why does it matter?

MATT
Take a wild fucking guess.

ERIC
I didn’t think you’d care so much.

MATT
You should’ve thought more then.

ERIC
How was I supposed to know?

MATT
You should’ve asked me.

ERIC
So I have to consult you every time I invite someone to a party?

MATT
You do when it’s my ex-girlfriend.

ERIC
I thought you two were cool now.

(Beat.)

MATT
We are.

ERIC
So what’s the problem?

MATT
It’s awkward.

ERIC
How?

MATT
It just is.

ERIC
But it was fine, right?

MATT
Yeah.

ERIC
And it wasn’t too weird between you.

MATT
No.

ERIC
So what’s the problem?

MATT
It’s the principle of the thing.

(Beat.)

You should’ve told me at least.

(Pause.)

ERIC
You’re right.

MATT
It’s okay.

ERIC
I should’ve told you.

MATT
Yeah.

(Beat.)

ERIC
I’m sorry.

MATT
It’s okay.

ERIC
I’ll make sure to next time.

MATT
Thanks.

(Blackout.)