Play 38: High School

INT. CLASSROOM-DAY

There is a teacher giving a lecture on US History, he is standing in front of a chalkboard writing various things on it. One student is asleep, lying slouched in his chair with his head resting against the wall and his mouth slightly open.

PULL BACK WIDE ON…

The students sitting in a U-shape around the teacher. The sleeping student is off to on side, one student has her hand up, some students are taking notes while others stare at their papers in boredom or whisper to their neighbors.

ZOOM IN ON…

DERRIN, dark brown hair, grey-green eyes, sitting in one of the back corners. He is sitting hunched forward with his elbows on his desk and his hands propping his head up. His pencil is hanging limply in his right hand and the pages in his binder are blank. He is staring forward with a blank and thoroughly bored expression on his face: his eyes are half closed and his mouth is just slightly open.

He leans back, resting his head on the window behind him, and sits silently staring for a few seconds and than suddenly jerks as if just having awoken, and looks up at the camera.

DERRIN
(whispering to camera—while he’s talking the other noise in the classroom fades out to a barely audible hum.)
I hate high school. Every class is like, this.

He gestures towards one of the other students.

PAN OVER TO…

JILL—blond hair blues eyes, pretty, skinny—raises her hand

TEACHER
And the answer is…yes Jill?

JILL
SARS?

There is a brief pause.

TEACHER
No, I’m sorry Jill, but the disease the settlers actually gave the Native people was Smallpox. Good guess though.

PAN BACK TO…

Derrin is sitting staring at her with an angry look.

DERRIN
(Whispering to camera.)
Are you fucking kidding me? SARS? I swear, some people are just so stupid it’s a miracle they’re even alive.

He looks down at his blank notes, and starts moving his hand to write something, then stops.

DERRIN
Fuck it. Know what’s the funniest part of it all? Everyone’s so self absorbed they don’t notice anything that happens. I mean, someone falls asleep every class, and I pretty much just sit here staring angrily every day. Sometimes I think I could do anything and no one would notice.

PULL BACK WIDE..

On entire classroom. Derrin gets out of his desk and gets up onto it, no one looks his way or notices, including the teacher who continues teaching his lesson. Derrin stands up fully onto his desk, and dives through the window behind him in a loud crash of shattering glass. The teacher looks over to the empty glass-shard covered desk where Derrin had been seated.

TEACHER
No, I’m sorry Derrin, “Dive through window randomly in the middle of class” is not the answer. Anyone else want to take a stab at it?

CUT BACK TO…

Derrin sitting back in his desk, all the glass is gone and the window is no longer broken.

DERRIN
Okay, so not anything, but you get my point.

TEACHER
Derrin, how about you?

Derrin’s head jerks away from the camera and he looks at the teacher.

DERRIN
What?

The teacher breathes out deeply with annoyance.

TEACHER
You heard the question.

DERRIN
Uhh…1848?

TEACHER
Very good.

He turns back to the board and continues on with the lesson.

DERRIN
(Back to camera.)
You might be wondering how I answered that question, I mean, I havn’t been paying any attention this entire class, even you can see that. Well, what can I say, I’m just that good.
(Pause.)
And, by “that good” I mean “I guess randomly because I know that with this teacher it’s always 1848." I love how predictable everything is.

TEACHER
And that’s how we got all the land from Mexico for 15 million dollars.

He looks up at the clock.

TEACHER
Well, class is over everyone. Remember to bring your textbooks next classes so we can fill out the maps.

All the students put their binders, notebooks and pencils away in their backpacks and head out. Derrin is the first one to leave.

DERRIN
And I survive yet another day in the wonderful state of eternal bliss that is high school.