Play 275: WMF’s

CHARACTERS
1
2
3
4
5
6

1
We need to think of a name.

2
I don’t have any ideas.

3
Does anyone have anything?

(Long pause.)

4
Anyone?

(Pause.)

5
This is harder than I thought.

6
I’ve got something.

2
Yeah?

(Beat.)

6
Nevermind.

3
No, what is it?

6
It sucks.

4
Just say it.

(Beat.)

6
The Pirates of Funk Island.

(Beat.)

5
That’s terrible.

6
I told you.

(Beat.)

5
Wow.

6
Can you think of anything better?

(Pause.)

5
(Smiling)
Batman Face.

(2 bursts into a fit of laughter.)

1
Come on, let’s be serious.

3
That was a joke, right?

5
Yeah.

(Beat.)

You really thought I was serious (beat.) with Batman face?

3
It’s possible.

2
(still laughing a little)
I don’t know about you guys, but I think Batman Face is fucking hilarious.

(Beat.)

4
That actually is pretty funny.

3
No.

2
Why not?

3
Are you kidding me? (Beat.) Batman Face?

4
Come on, it’s great.

6
No way.

1
No one would take us seriously.

5
It’s terrible.

2
You’re the one who said it.

5
It was a joke.

(Beat.)

2
Damn.

(Long pause.)

1
Anyone?

(Pause.)

2
I’ve got it.

6
Oh god.

2
What?

1
What is it?

2
If you don’t want to hear it…

4
We do, just tell us.

3
This better not be anything like Batman Face.

5
Hey, that was just a joke.

2
Do you want to hear the name or not?

1
Yeah, what is it?

(Beat.)

2
Weapons of Mass Funk.

(Beat.)

(1, 2, 4, and 5 burst into fits of laughter.)

4
(Inbetween laughter)
Okay, that’s awesome.

1
Definitely.

5
It is pretty amusing.

3
I don’t know…

6
I’m not so sure either.

2
Can you think of anything better?

(Pause.)

3
Fine.

6
But just until we think of a better name.

2
Fine, but it’s never going to happen.

(Beat.)

(Pause.)

2
Weapons of Mass Funk…

(He bursts into laughter.)

(Blackout.)