Play 156: First Day Back

CHARACTERS
ANNOUNCER
BEN
TEACHER 1
TEACHER 2
TEACHER 3

(The announcer stands in the front and center of an empty stage.)

ANNOUNCER
And now, we bring to you, a brief representation of the first day back at school after a break. Enjoy!

(He exits.)

(Ben enters and stands in the middle of the stage.)

(Pause, he yawns.)

(Teacher 1 enters with a gigantic stack of papers.)

BEN
Hey.

TEACHER 1
Hi.

(Beat.)

Oh, here’s your new paper assignment.)

(He hands Ben a small stack of papers.)

TEACHER 1
I expect it to be turned in by three o’clock tomorrow.

BEN
But—

(The teacher exits before he can finish his sentence.)

(Beat.)

(Teacher 2 enters with a giant stack of papers.)

BEN
Hey.

TEACHER 2
Here are a few packets of exercises to help prepare you for the test on Wednesday.

BEN
(Alarmed.)
The test?

TEACHER 2
Yes.

BEN
On Wednesday?

TEACHER 2
Yes.

(He hands Ben a fat stack of papers, then exits.)

(Ben looks down at the papers, sighs, and yawns.)

(Teacher 3 enters, also with many papers.)

TEACHER 3
Here.

(He hands Ben a stack of what appears to be around a hundred papers, placing them on top of the already substantial pile in his hands.)

BEN
What are they?

TEACHER 3
The test from before break, practice questions for the test tomorrow, homework for tomorrow, homework for Wednesday, the reflection for Friday.

BEN
(In disbelief.)
Are you serious?

TEACHER 3
(Laughing.)
No, of course not, there’s no reflection due Friday.

BEN
(Slightly disappointed but nonetheless a little less anxious looking.)
Oh, that’s good at least—

TEACHER 3
But there is a 20 page research paper.

BEN
What?!

(Teacher 3 extis.)

(Ben looks down at the giant stack of papers, which is now teetering in his hands unstably.)

BEN
(Muttering.)
You’ve got to be fucking kidding me…

(Suddenly the papers tilt precariously, he tries to steady the stack, but it falls, and the papers fall all over the ground.)

(Beat.)

(Ben walks over to the side of the stage, and begins beating his head on the wall.)

(Fade out.)