Play 220: Why Would I?

CHARACTER
BILLY, 17
ERIC, 17
DAVE, 18

(Billy and Eric are sitting at a table in a school cafeteria eating lunch.)

BILLY
That’s cool.

(Beat.)

What’s it about?

ERIC
It’s about a conspiracy plot around the Kennedy assassination.

BILLY
That’s cool.

ERIC
Yeah, and a lot of the characters are fictitious, but a bunch are real too. Like Lee Harvey Oswald, or this dude Guy Bannister.

(Beat.)

Or Kennedy, obviously.

BILLY
Know what’s weird?

ERIC
What?

BILLY
Apparently he had six fingers on his left hand.

ERIC
Kennedy?

BILLY
Yeah.

ERIC
Really?

BILLY
Yeah.

(Dave walks over to their table with some food in hand.)

ERIC
Are you sure?

BILLY
One-hundred percent.

(Dave sits down next to them.)

ERIC
Wow, that is strange.

DAVE
What is?

ERIC
Billy says JFK had six fingers on his left hand.

BILLY
Yup.

DAVE
Strange.

BILLY
Yeah.

(Beat.)

DAVE
I wonder why I’ve never heard of it.

ERIC
Yeah.

BILLY
I guess it’s not talked about much.

DAVE
Then how did you hear of it?

BILLY
I did a research paper on him in 8th grade, it was in one of the random books I used for it.

(Eric looks down at his watc.)

ERIC
Shit.

BILLY
What?

ERIC
I gotta get some work done before lunch ends.

BILLY
Okay.

ERIC
See you guys later.

(He exits.)

(Beat.)

DAVE
Did you make that up?

BILLY
What?

DAVE
You know, the Kennedy thing.

BILLY
Why would I?

DAVE
I guess you have a point.

(Beat.)

Doesn’t mean you didn’t make it up though.

(Beat.)

BILLY
True.

(Blackout.)