Play 97: Venting In Scene Form (aka, If I Was As Violent A Person As Scene Like This Would Suggest, I Would Be On Death Row)

CHARACTERS
ANNOUNCER, Middle-aged
VINCENT, 17
GIRL, 17
GIRL 2, 17
GIRL 3, 17
GUY 1, 17
GUY 2, 17
GUY 3, 17

(The announcer stands off slightly to the side on the front of the stage with a microphone stand in front of him. There is a spotlight on him.)

ANNOUNCER
Welcome everyone, to today’s episode of “Shit You Would Pull If It Weren’t For Your Morality and The Possible Repercussions.” Without further ado, here’s the first scenario.

(The spotlight goes out.)

(Lights up on the middle section of the stage, where two girls are talking.)

GIRL 1
I mean, what a slut.

GIRL 2
I know.

(Girl 3 enters. She walks up to them.)

GIRL 1
What the fuck do you want?

GIRL 3
I just—

GIRL 1
(Cutting her off.)
Well I don’t care, why don’t you go kill yourself you fat stupid bitch.

(Girl 3 runs offstage crying.)

GIRL 1
Who did she think she is trying to talk to us?

GIRL 2
Who knows, I don’t understand ugly people.

(Vincent enters. He walks over to them, they don’t appear to notice.)

GIRL 1
So, yesterday, I totally—

(She is cut off mid-sentence by Vincent punching her in the face. She is launched to the side and falls over.)

(Girl 2 stands staring in mute and utter shock.)

VINCENT
That’s for treating her like shit!

(He kicks her.)

That’s for being a heartless bitch in general!

(He kicks her again.)

And that’s for being stupid stupid stupid!

(He kicks her several more times.)

(Girl 2 runs offstage in horror.)

(Lights down in the middle of the stage, spotlight back up on announcer.)

ANNOUNCER
God do I want to do that sometimes.

(Beat.)

Onwards to the next scenario!

(Spotlight down, lights up on middle of stage. There are two guys talking.)

GUY 1
And can you imagine, that bitch got mad at me for not calling her the next day?

GUY 2
What the fuck?

GUY 1
I know, it’s like, sorry bitch, but if I wanted to talk to you, would I have left in the middle of the night after I fucked you?

GUY 2
What a dumb ho.

GUY 1
I know.

(Beat.)

I mean, who did she think I was? A goddamn fag?

(Vincent enters with a baseball bat.)

GUY 1
(To him.)
What the hell do you want?

(Vincent bashes him in the face with the baseball bat.)

(He falls to the ground.)

(Lights down on middle of the stage, spotlight back on announcer.)

ANNOUNCER
Baseball bat to the face, classic.

(Beat.)

And now our last one for the night!

(Spotlight down, lights up on middle of the stage. Vincent is sitting next to another guy at a table eating lunch.)

VINCENT
I dunno, it’s just been really getting to me lately.

(Guy 3 doesn’t respond, he appears to not be listening.)

(Pause.)

VINCENT
Did you hear what I said?

GUY 3
Oh, sorry, what were you talking about?

VINCENT
Here, let me try to rephrase it.

(Beat.)

(He pulls out a knife and stabs the guy in the back.)

(He falls over grasping at the knife in his back and screaming.)

VINCENT
(Filled with hostility.)
Did you hear it that time, huh?!

(Lights down, spotlight back on announcer.)

ANNOUNCER
Well, that’s it for tonight ladies and gentleman. Tune in next time, when we’ll have “Won’t he ever shut up?” and “Shoving dynamite up stuck-up white people’s asses.” Goodnight.

(He walks offstage.)

(Blackout.)